Post by nottheonion on Feb 10, 2019 1:30:07 GMT
So after I got in touch with this guy after I pulled away, we texted a lil bit. He told me he missed me, that he’s still away and hopes work has calmed down for me. Then he just stopped texting a few days ago. I have a feeling that might be the end for us so I’m now slowly moving on and reflecting on my last pulling away behaviour.
I’ve been looking into a lot of other aspects of my life which show my avoidant side. I’ve always had problems opening up to people. I do open up but often only do so when I’m depressive state and needed someone to talk to. I made the bold move of confiding in one of my good colleagues about this guy. I wasn’t desperate to talk to anyone. I always trusted this colleague and we are very good friends. It felt really liberating telling him what happened.
I had an argument with my FA ex last time. I reached out to him to make peace and told him something I’d never thought I would at this stage “I do still care about you”. I wasn’t lying. I don’t have any romantic feelings for him anymore but I do still care for him. It felt scary to say it but I felt that I just needed to say it.
I also have the tendency to avoid people and shut myself down. There are times when I would love to talk to my family but I would just wait for them to contact me. My mum has complained I never got in touch. Today I rang my mum and texted all my old friends to talk. I’m going to change this aspect of my life and makes sure I reach out to my loved ones as much as I could.
I find it really hard to trust people in general, at work or in life. I’m slowly learning to trust people, first by giving more tasks and instructions to my junior and slowly letting go of wanting to have control over everything.
Giving compliments and being less critical are also on the agenda. This is more for changing the fact that I sometimes come across as uninterested and unappreciative of whoever I’m dating.
I’m hoping this could potentially help other FAs out there or if we could keep track of our own progress together
Onwards and upwards
I’ve been looking into a lot of other aspects of my life which show my avoidant side. I’ve always had problems opening up to people. I do open up but often only do so when I’m depressive state and needed someone to talk to. I made the bold move of confiding in one of my good colleagues about this guy. I wasn’t desperate to talk to anyone. I always trusted this colleague and we are very good friends. It felt really liberating telling him what happened.
I had an argument with my FA ex last time. I reached out to him to make peace and told him something I’d never thought I would at this stage “I do still care about you”. I wasn’t lying. I don’t have any romantic feelings for him anymore but I do still care for him. It felt scary to say it but I felt that I just needed to say it.
I also have the tendency to avoid people and shut myself down. There are times when I would love to talk to my family but I would just wait for them to contact me. My mum has complained I never got in touch. Today I rang my mum and texted all my old friends to talk. I’m going to change this aspect of my life and makes sure I reach out to my loved ones as much as I could.
I find it really hard to trust people in general, at work or in life. I’m slowly learning to trust people, first by giving more tasks and instructions to my junior and slowly letting go of wanting to have control over everything.
Giving compliments and being less critical are also on the agenda. This is more for changing the fact that I sometimes come across as uninterested and unappreciative of whoever I’m dating.
I’m hoping this could potentially help other FAs out there or if we could keep track of our own progress together
Onwards and upwards
