mamut
Full Member
Posts: 212
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Up date
Jun 8, 2019 13:03:33 GMT
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Post by mamut on Jun 8, 2019 13:03:33 GMT
Helsbells I'm glad he replied and explained! Yeah it sucks, I'd be thinking about the whys and so on too, only to realize that the reason I wouldn't like his response was probably because I was still wanting for him to say something like "I blocked you to gather my thoughts, now I want you back, I wont ever leave you and I have all my insecurities solved". Which translates to hope. Its usually the source of my anger towards exes when they do something I don't like.
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Post by kristyrose on Jun 8, 2019 15:35:54 GMT
Hey there,
Just seeing this.
I am glad he responded as its good to at least hear back to some extent, however, in true avoidant fashion he is back but not. My ex did this to me a lot, he would disappear without any real reason, maybe we spent to much time together in a given weekend, maybe hes just an ahole, either way he would send a text like "hey wanna see a movie later" and I'd always feel hopeful and happy and see him, only to realize he did it for HIM to feel safe and know that I'm always there whenever he needs me.
I think that could be whats going on here. Your ex wants to know you're still there when HE needs the reassurance, if he really wanted to go away for your sake, he would have stayed away.
I think you will feel so much better if you initiate blocking him and moving on. I'm telling you, the first few weeks will be the toughest but it will get easier and easier and if you decide to unblock him, he will be there waiting, but it wont be to love you back, it will be to ease his own pain.
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Up date
Jun 8, 2019 16:26:58 GMT
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Post by mrob on Jun 8, 2019 16:26:58 GMT
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Post by leavethelighton on Jun 9, 2019 0:52:37 GMT
Hmm. Someone claiming to do something you didn't ask them to do so as to help YOU move on ... hmmm. Not taking accountability for their choice to disappear but instead acting like they're doing you a favor by violating your wishes...hmm.... Seems kind of gaslighty to me.... glad it helped you though.
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