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Post by tnr9 on Oct 26, 2023 18:41:35 GMT
When I am annoyed with someone while driving…..I tend to “engage” instead of just moving around and being on my way. I do not understand the root of this behavior but am aware it is very childish (more like an angry teenager) and in the end fruitless. The road is really the only place this happens as I have worked to address this in other areas of my life with success. I usually start off with a much more understanding and open stance and then something sparks it and off I go in an ineffective state. I have been trying to access the source to address this at the root, but so far have not been terribly successful. Anyone have insights?
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Post by alexandra on Oct 26, 2023 19:43:38 GMT
Do you have any associations with cars that might make you feel differently in them? Were your parents angry or yelling drivers when you were young in the car and had no control over the motion? Did that feel especially scary? Or is it something more related to you do have control over your vehicle now, it symbolizes freedom and you are in charge of going where you wish, and when someone say cuts you off, you're perceiving it as a threat to your autonomy?
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Post by cherrycola on Oct 26, 2023 23:52:41 GMT
That is a really excellent question. I really had to ponder this one. Do you personalize their actions? Like they didn't just do something stupid but they "cut YOU off" ? Is it a sense of fairness? "I am a good driver who follows the rules and they just did something not allowed" ?
It would be hard to do but next time it happens, listen to the story that you tell yourself about what just happened.
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Post by introvert on Oct 30, 2023 9:45:35 GMT
Do you feel invisible?
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Post by tnr9 on Nov 2, 2023 11:47:30 GMT
Great question…..I had a therapy session where we explored why I look at the road as a chess set and came to the conclusion that when I am behind people I feel boxed in….and change lanes to get ahead and have freedom. In the course of this conversation, old fears of being judged came up, but my therapist clarified she just wanted to understand the behavior to understand the root. I do think acceptance=freedom….and maybe if I had had that growing up, this driving behavior would not have started….but I have a chance now to bring more awareness. |
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