Post by Deleted on Jan 22, 2018 15:52:40 GMT
There is a tremendous amount of pain in this forum, and i get it.
I have an incredibly complex childhood history of trauma, compounded by life threatening trauma in adulthood, and i have been on a healing path for about 24 years.
I was born to a mentally ill mother and alcoholic father and there was no way to develop securely.
During the course of my life, i have had to discover layers of myself. It’s been like peeling back layers of an onion. Each of our stories and life situations is unique, and we have varying degrees of dysfunction. I have lived the anxious side of the coin at times, and know how painful it is.
while I tend toward avoidant under stress, the quality of my relationships has improved greatly by exploring my inner wounding and ways that my perceptions and thought patterns have shaped my experiences. I have had to develop a real, intimate relationship with MYSELF, and strangely enough, a blog about “the other side of the coin” has helped me tremendously.
I think we all are quite similar way down at the core, and need to develop true love and respect for ourselves, we need to forgive ourselves. we need to right the misunderstandings of who we are that were shaped by flawed humans doing the best they could- our parents. They transmitted their pain to us, and we have an opportunity to heal it. right inside ourselves.
As an avoidant by nature, i can say that the author of this blog misses the mark on the true intention and inner workings of an emotionally unavailable person, at least when it comes to me. But i get that she is operating from “the other side of the coin”. I find her insight to be near enlightenment. She really is gifted in helping us to identify our own thought processes and wounds and how to heal and empower our adult selves.
Her blog and books have helped me, and while i had to turn to other sources to really find help for my avoidant tendencies, i still return to her work sometimes, it’s a multi faceted endeavor to keep healthy.
Anyway, this link is an introduction to some of her wisdom, and i hope it helps. I recommend her work to many of my clients who share their relationship distress, and have gotten good feedback.
www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/understanding-what-makes-you-angry-why-in-relationships-and-post-breakup-part-one/
I have an incredibly complex childhood history of trauma, compounded by life threatening trauma in adulthood, and i have been on a healing path for about 24 years.
I was born to a mentally ill mother and alcoholic father and there was no way to develop securely.
During the course of my life, i have had to discover layers of myself. It’s been like peeling back layers of an onion. Each of our stories and life situations is unique, and we have varying degrees of dysfunction. I have lived the anxious side of the coin at times, and know how painful it is.
while I tend toward avoidant under stress, the quality of my relationships has improved greatly by exploring my inner wounding and ways that my perceptions and thought patterns have shaped my experiences. I have had to develop a real, intimate relationship with MYSELF, and strangely enough, a blog about “the other side of the coin” has helped me tremendously.
I think we all are quite similar way down at the core, and need to develop true love and respect for ourselves, we need to forgive ourselves. we need to right the misunderstandings of who we are that were shaped by flawed humans doing the best they could- our parents. They transmitted their pain to us, and we have an opportunity to heal it. right inside ourselves.
As an avoidant by nature, i can say that the author of this blog misses the mark on the true intention and inner workings of an emotionally unavailable person, at least when it comes to me. But i get that she is operating from “the other side of the coin”. I find her insight to be near enlightenment. She really is gifted in helping us to identify our own thought processes and wounds and how to heal and empower our adult selves.
Her blog and books have helped me, and while i had to turn to other sources to really find help for my avoidant tendencies, i still return to her work sometimes, it’s a multi faceted endeavor to keep healthy.
Anyway, this link is an introduction to some of her wisdom, and i hope it helps. I recommend her work to many of my clients who share their relationship distress, and have gotten good feedback.
www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/understanding-what-makes-you-angry-why-in-relationships-and-post-breakup-part-one/
