Post by Gay anxious on Nov 13, 2016 0:51:06 GMT
So we hear a lot about how avoidant and anxious individuals are generally not very compatible while secure people CAN make it work with all three(or four) types. But my interest is in viewing that attachment style is really a continuum are their specific differences or similarities that typically work? For instance, reading the dismissive avoidant threads we hear a lot from even secure people that being with a very avoidant partner can be a struggle even for them, but some of these same individuals indicate they would find an anxious partner even more difficult. Are more avoidant secures more able to make it work with avoidants or is this usually a preference based on other personal tastes?
As an anxious I think I would be happier with a more anxious secure, someone that wants a lot of closeness and more likely to understand my need of more frequent reassurance.
At the same time I have read that avoidants and anxious are more attracted to each other than secures and I'm wondering if this also plays out in a spectrum manner. As an anxious would I typically be more attracted to and attractive to slightly avoidant secures and therefore maybe despite slight difficulties find more stability in the relationship?
As an anxious I think I would be happier with a more anxious secure, someone that wants a lot of closeness and more likely to understand my need of more frequent reassurance.
At the same time I have read that avoidants and anxious are more attracted to each other than secures and I'm wondering if this also plays out in a spectrum manner. As an anxious would I typically be more attracted to and attractive to slightly avoidant secures and therefore maybe despite slight difficulties find more stability in the relationship?