Post by leavethelighton on Aug 12, 2018 0:41:10 GMT
Today I'm thinking about my relationship with my sister. She lives on a different continent, and we see each other in person around every 18 months.
Anyway, we have that sort of dynamic where I often feel that I can't fully be me. For example, the last time I wrote her an email that was authentic, complex, real (in response to her email), she never wrote back. We texted and had a vacation in person, but she never responded to the e mail.
For awhile after her non-response, I had to talk myself down from the "Fine, I'm done communicating with her" sort of hurt over-reaction, though it does make me hesitate to ever write anything "real" again. Also when we are hanging out in person, she makes it often clear that she only wants to hear positivity (though she seems to oscillate herself between self-enforced positivity and a wider range of expressive emotions). The vacation was weird too, like by the end she almost seemed to be avoiding me, but practically the second we're back in our respective cities she posts on Facebook about missing being together.
How do you forge an ongoing sisterhood with someone when this is the dynamic? We could keep things superficial, but we have a lot in common, and also we were quite close at some points growing up, and I don't really want a distant-superficial relationship with her. If we lived in the same city and saw each other a lot I feel like the path forward would be much more clear.
