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Post by Deleted on Dec 3, 2018 15:39:34 GMT
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Post by leavethelighton on Dec 4, 2018 0:40:54 GMT
I wonder why Firestone sees a connection with insecure attachment and fear of mortality.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 4, 2018 5:36:48 GMT
I wonder why Firestone sees a connection with insecure attachment and fear of mortality. Funnily enough, I’m a researcher on terror management theory which discusses how people develop psychological defenses due to fear of mortality. The idea is really that people don’t like the idea of dying but they can’t avoid it, and this tension creates lots of anxiety or terror. Thus, humans develop things like culture, worldviews, relationships etc to give their lives meaning and structure, so that life isn’t so pointless. |
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lilos
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Post by lilos on Dec 4, 2018 7:20:02 GMT
I wonder why Firestone sees a connection with insecure attachment and fear of mortality. Funnily enough, I’m a researcher on terror management theory which discusses how people develop psychological defenses due to fear of mortality. The idea is really that people don’t like the idea of dying but they can’t avoid it, and this tension creates lots of anxiety or terror. Thus, humans develop things like culture, worldviews, relationships etc to give their lives meaning and structure, so that life isn’t so pointless. I think it was in attached where they talked about how attachment was potentially a survival mechanism and that was really helpful for me to be able to think of if as a evolutionary thing that just wasn’t relevant anymore. Kind of like our drive for sugar that we still carry because it’s calorie dense which is useful when we had limited access to food but that’s not a problem in modern society so if you don’t keep a check on it your biological drive actually hurts you. With attachment I came to see it as a biological drive to increase my chances of procreation and survival. That my fears of losing a person I have attached to is related to my need for them to keep me safe and alive. And if I can see that those threats aren’t actually real anymore I can better keep it in check. I think in attached it talked about how having avoidant attachment was like having diversity in the system- that there could be some potential evolutionary benefit to not attaching to your mates and being able to survive fully independent for long periods. There was a section that talked about the AP need to know where their mate is- to search for them. To look for them where ever they go and to potentially try to go to the places they think they will find them as an evolutionary advantage- to help you find your mate should you get separated or something. I wish I still had the book so I could reread it. It was fascinating to think of it that way. |
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Post by alexandra on Dec 5, 2018 1:28:12 GMT
Funnily enough, I’m a researcher on terror management theory which discusses how people develop psychological defenses due to fear of mortality. The idea is really that people don’t like the idea of dying but they can’t avoid it, and this tension creates lots of anxiety or terror. Thus, humans develop things like culture, worldviews, relationships etc to give their lives meaning and structure, so that life isn’t so pointless. I think it was in attached where they talked about how attachment was potentially a survival mechanism and that was really helpful for me to be able to think of if as a evolutionary thing that just wasn’t relevant anymore. Kind of like our drive for sugar that we still carry because it’s calorie dense which is useful when we had limited access to food but that’s not a problem in modern society so if you don’t keep a check on it your biological drive actually hurts you. With attachment I came to see it as a biological drive to increase my chances of procreation and survival. That my fears of losing a person I have attached to is related to my need for them to keep me safe and alive. And if I can see that those threats aren’t actually real anymore I can better keep it in check. I think in attached it talked about how having avoidant attachment was like having diversity in the system- that there could be some potential evolutionary benefit to not attaching to your mates and being able to survive fully independent for long periods. There was a section that talked about the AP need to know where their mate is- to search for them. To look for them where ever they go and to potentially try to go to the places they think they will find them as an evolutionary advantage- to help you find your mate should you get separated or something. I wish I still had the book so I could reread it. It was fascinating to think of it that way. Existential nihilism! I still haven't read Attached, but I have posted before that I think it's helpful to view insecure attachment styles as a defense mechanism out of context (made sense as a kid, but not as an adult), so I'm happy to see your post  |
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