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Post by alexandra on Dec 18, 2020 21:52:20 GMT
seeking, focusing on yourself and all those things you listed sounds great, especially with the additional complications from the pandemic affecting dating new people anyway. Fantasy bonds and trauma bonds don't have to be mutually exclusive. I posted this link on another thread. I don't know much about the website, but it was a good article speaking more to the formation of roles I was talking about and how it can turn into projected fantasy bonding. But in summary, it's more about dating someone's potential rather than reality. www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/psychology-of-fantasy-bonds-in-relationships-and-how-they-formI believe trauma bonds are more, things started out good and seemed safe, and then there was a switch so that there was abuse and intermittent reinforcement introduced later on. So the person suddenly being abused is confused, perhaps blames themselves for the change, and yearns for the previously "safe" and loving version of the partner to reappear, feeling a high and anxiety reduction when it does.
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Post by seeking on Dec 19, 2020 14:16:32 GMT
That helps! Makes sense!
Thanks for all your wisdom, Alexandra!
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Post by alexandra on Dec 19, 2020 22:25:14 GMT
You're welcome, I'm glad it's helpful. And you've definitely been sounding like you've come a long way already even from 6 months ago, so keep going with your process because it sounds like you're making progress, even if it takes time
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