Lola
Junior Member
Posts: 71 
|
Post by Lola on Jan 14, 2018 19:37:34 GMT
Hey yall! I'm sure that others too think this attachment theory thing is not something that should infect your life. Obviously, we can't help it.. to an extent. This is what I intend to ask; is it normal or delusional to feel ok, like I'm not activated and have it be really true? My boyfriend literally told me "one more activation and I'm out". The week before I was so depressed I couldn't get out of bed, but now I'm fine. I fear that this is only temporary and I will be activated again soon. I start seeing things more clearly, but I don't know whether this is a delusional coping mechanism.
|
|
|
|
Post by Jaeger on Jan 15, 2018 16:00:06 GMT
Well, it could be both. The defining factor here is if all the negative tendencies (emotional and cognitive) are actually absent - in which case it's normal- or you're just ignoring them and convincing yourself they are when they're not - in which case it's repression/delusional-. To be honest, if I was wondering which of these were actually true, I would seriously consider seeing someone to help me find that answer.
|
|
|
|
Post by tnr9 on Jan 15, 2018 16:18:44 GMT
Sometimes when I would feel that way...I would discover that somehow I had gotten a "fix" that I was milking that made my attachment system not activate. I loved those times..but unfortunately they did not last. I am in one right now with my ex....he sent 3 very generic texts..but I think my attachment system is reading that as hope. The other thing I considered is that I spent quite a bit of time recently with some secure friends who have validated my experience by saying that the things that bothered me would have also bothered them...so perhaps that gave me some "peace". It is good for you to notice this...really consider what is driving your calm.  |
|
Lola
Junior Member
Posts: 71
|
Post by Lola on Jan 17, 2018 21:08:49 GMT
Well, it could be both. The defining factor here is if all the negative tendencies (emotional and cognitive) are actually absent - in which case it's normal- or you're just ignoring them and convincing yourself they are when they're not - in which case it's repression/delusional-. To be honest, if I was wondering which of these were actually true, I would seriously consider seeing someone to help me find that answer. Already on it. My DA (I'm guessing) unintentionally had gaslighted me a lot, since he's very good at discussions and at philosophy even when I'm right he can win an argument. So not sure what to believe, probably going crazy. Thank you for the answer. It helps |
|
