This article describes my AP self with unavailable guys

Thanks, I enjoyed this article, I could definitely relate,

i was opening this article this morning to read it but didn't get a chance to finish it-
but i can tell you it made me think of something i NEVER thought to wonder- what is the attraction of an AP to. DA?!?
lol
i always was just inside my own head trying to figure that out and it made me wonder what past partners were drawn to in me . Maybe my unavailability? I am wondering about things i never wondered about before.

I will take a look, i'm not worried about being offended by it if it's hard on DA's because i know most of the stuff written is written from the partner perspective.
But yeah i will weigh in when i have a chance!

I happen to think that relationships really serve the ultimate purpose of showing us our shadow, and giving us an opportunity to shine light on it and grow. The long ones, the short ones, all this interaction, in my mind, has a deep soul purpose that has the potential to advance consciousness and healing, or unconsciousness and wounding- depending on the course we choose. So i don't look at things as always and forever love stories unless two people choose that together... i look at, how can i be my best self here and help my partner do the same? How can i evolve? How do we heal? So, no relationship is pointless, because even pain points us toward the truth of us so we can grow.

But, that's another topic. I'll crack into this soon!

Future and Juniper,
I am glad I came across this forum as before this I was reading and taking advice from such, "relationship experts", instead of going to the source!
Real people, open and honestly trying to understand their behavior and that of others. It is so helpful and inspiring.

My interpretation from the article is that the partners we choose reflect a little of who we are, and how we feel about ourselves. When we choose partners who are either unavailable or cannot meet our needs, we must look inward. The author realized that part of the reason why she was attracted to him was because they both were a little wounded and she could relate to him in that manner. Realizing this, she decided to make better choices for herself.

Anxious Preoccupieds and Das sometimes tear each other apart when We both have insecure attachment styles. I feel that when we demonize our partners, the people we chose to stay with for a significant amount of time, it doesn’t put us in a good light because we chose them. Instead of casting blame, its more productive to look at our own shortcomings so we don’t continue to make unhealthy choices.

absolutely, i know your post was just getting at the AP side and what it feels like for you, not aiming at DA.
i just got curious